Recently
my phone rang. I answered it and on the
other end was a telemarketer, trying to convince me to buy some kind of movie
package for my TV. It was described as a
great deal, unlimited movies (that were not the ones found on HBO and the other
pay-channels) for one low price (I can’t remember the quoted price but I think
it was near $30). This was a special
offer for a monthly trial, which, I think, means the price goes up considerably
the second month.
After the spiel, the last line was,
“So can I sign you up for the month?” I
do try to be polite to telemarketers because I know their job isn’t easy and I
believe they are often treated rudely on the phone, so I tried to frame my
answer softly: “No, I really don’t have much time to watch movies, so it
wouldn’t be worth it to me.” Then I
realized the telemarketer had hung up on me immediately after the word “No”. There was no “All right, thank you for your
time” or “Maybe another time” or “Have a nice day”. There was no goodbye. Just a rude hang-up (at least that’s how I
received it).
The next day, I was walking out of a
grocery store with my mother and was maneuvering around behind a car when the
driver honked his horn. Horns tend to be
loud and both my mother and I were startled by the unexpected loud noise. As we walked a few more feet, the driver of
the car saw us and apologized profusely for startling us. The driver was trying to get someone’s
attention and didn’t know we were there.
I was most impressed by the caring reaction of the driver. No hint of rudeness whatsoever, just sincere
concern.
As an occasional recipient of rude
behavior (aren’t we all?), I admit that rude behavior leaves a negative feeling
inside me—rudeness implies that I don’t matter as a person and that’s not a
pleasant feeling. It can affect the rest
of my day. The opposite happens when
someone treats me like I matter. I
experience a pleasantly good feeling which I think affects the rest of my day.
I’m not sure why it’s so difficult for
people to say “Excuse me” or “I’m sorry” or even a simple “Thank you”. It seems to me that that takes less energy
than ignoring another person or being deliberately negative toward them. Growing up, I had the idea that men were
supposedly ruder than women (who were more sensitive), although I’m not sure
that’s exactly the case today. The
telemarketer I encountered was a woman; the driver a young man.
Somehow I don’t think there is any room for
rudeness in Christianity. That doesn’t
mean we act wimpy and let others walk all over us. Jesus certainly confronted people who taught
others misunderstandings about God, but characteristically Jesus wasn’t what we
might call negative. He brought the Good News of salvation to many (no, not
everyone always listened to Him); He gave second chances; He ate with sinners;
He treated others with respect unless (until) they were leading others astray
(then in a chastening way, He spoke up and spoke out about the dangers of such
sin).
Rudeness flows from an “I”-centered
existence. (“I” am more important than
anyone else; “MY” way is better than anyone else’s way.) That is not, of course, what our faith teaches
us—and if we think it does, we’re misunderstanding both the faith and God.
I realize we are all victims of rudeness on
occasion, but that doesn’t give us the right to act the same toward
others. If we react in kind, then we’ve
become the perpetrators. The grace of
God gives us the ability to make better choices.
Have a blessed week .
. .
No comments:
Post a Comment